Saturday, February 2, 2013

in honor of michelle rhee and her soon to be released memoir. the 3rd edition of michelle rhee - a glossarhee


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Rheeality:  an existence devoid of facts
Rheeally:  used to express surprise, interest or doubt as in “RUFKM?”  Serheeously!
Rheeap:  to obtain employment, wealth or stature through the efforts and/or contributions of sugar daddy billionaires
Rheecall: to cancel, take back, or revoke – sort of – a lie one has told
Rheecipient: an individual receiving kudos or monetary prizes based on false data
Rheecommendation:  a suggestion made by a highly unqualified person
Rheedact: to delete factual information from written or oral communication because said information does not support the rheetoric
Rheeduce: to diminish the status of professional public educators
Rheedundant: to rheepeat talking points endlessly in order to avoid questions whose answers would not support a particular rheeality
Rheefer: an herb smoked by corporate education deformers, often used to come up with the ridiculous shit they rheegurgitate incessantly
Rheeform:  drastic change imposed by clueless people and unsupported by peer-reviewed research or facts
Rheeformer:  an education deformer committed to imposing drastic change while willfully ignoring input from experts
Rheefudiate: to refuse to be challenged when telling lies, regardless of evidence
Rheefund: bonuses forced to be returned by rheecipients of rheewards based on excessive rheerasures
Rheefurbish: to attempt to repair the status and reputation of one caught in a lie
Rheegret:  sadness felt by a rheeformer when caught in a lie and/or cheating
Rheegurgitate:  to spew out nonsense; usually done by education deformers
Rheehearse: to practice and repeat key phrases or sound bites for later public performance; e.g. status quo; dramatically change; change the trajectory; put adult interests ahead of students; rheesearch shows; a teacher’s value-added; I don't give a crap.
Rheeinstate: to call back teachers fired based on criteria that violated contract
Rheeinvent:  to spin shamelessly in order to aggrandize one’s self
Rheeism:  a lie
Rheelay:  to receive and pass on misinformation and/or lies
Rheelinquish: to give up one’s throne due to the anger of the constituency
Rheeluctant: unwilling or disinclined to deal with facts
Rheemail:  an electronic communication generated by an education rheeformer
Rheemember:  to rheecall alleged facts based on hearsay
Rheemove:  to fire without cause; to fire and replace with cheap, unqualified labor
Rheepeal:  in tandem with complicit union leaders, to make invalid contractual protections, denying educators of important rights
Rheepeat:  stating a lie over and over in an attempt to create a truth
Rheephrase: to express a lie in a different way, especially with the purpose of inciting fear or deflecting truth when confronted with facts
Rheeplace: to change a wrong answer to a right answer; provide or find a substitute for an ousted quack or fraud
Rheeplay:  to play back a section of a rheecording in order to watch and/or hear one’s self again and again and again
Rheeply:  an answer most likely untrue
Rheeprehensible: see Michelle Rhee
Rheerase:  a strategy employed to raise test scores
Rheerasure:  the outcome as a rheesult of rheerasing.
Rheesearch:  a billionaire-funded investigation initiated to support a predetermined outcome
Rheesign:  to leave a job after 3 years
Rheesist: to vigorously deny facts
Rheespond: to answer a question with a lie
Rheespect: a positive feeling of esteem or deference given to public education deformers, Teach for America, or those determining education policy with no background in education whatsoever
Rheestate:  to state again the same lie in a new form
Rheesult:  an outcome obtained through questionable, unethical, illegal, or immoral means; a fake outcome
Rheesumé:  a page full of lies
Rheetaliate:  to seek revenge in an especially evil manner
Rheetard:  a devotee of Michelle Rhee; a member of the Michelle Rhee Fan Club
Rheetell:  to change one’s story multiple times; back peddle
Rheetire: to be forcefully driven from one’s position or occupation under a cloak of controversy
Rheetoric: sh!t spewed by Michelle Rhee and other like-minded deformer idiots (See Duncan, Gates, Broad, Kopp, Guggenheim, Oprah, and most of the cast of Waiting for Superman)
Rheetract:  to quickly take back or disavow incorrectly marked test answers or verifiable statements of intentional misinformation
Rheeturn: to elect, or rheeelect, legislators favorable to corporate deformer agendas, usually Republicans or Neo-Liberal Democrats
Rheeverse: acting, operating, or arranged in a manner contrary to proven effective public education policies
Rheeview:  to examine facts then willfully and intentionally dismiss them
Rheevile:  to criticize in an abusive or angrily insulting manner, often involving the word crap or crappy
Rheevise:  to prepare a newly rheerased, edited version of what rheelly was; to intentionally change or modify in order to mislead
Rheevision:  an illegally altered final draft or new version of existing material
Rheevoke: in high-stakes testing, a revoke is a violation of important rules serious enough to render the results invalid. A rheevoke is a violation ranked in seriousness equal to overt cheating, a major offense that is not accidental.
Rheeview: to look over, study, examine facts again then choose to ignore them
Rheevolution: an attack on public education orchestrated by the corporate education deformers.
Rheeward:  a monetary prize based on bogus test scores
Rheewrite:  to write something again in order to embellish or falsify an existing document
Unrheedeemable:  not capable of being cured or reformed due to vicious, destructive actions taken in the name of corporate ed deform
Unrheesonable:  having unsound judgment; unfair and insensible; often in regard to education policy