Saturday, February 2, 2013

in honor of michelle rhee and her soon to be released memoir. the 3rd edition of michelle rhee - a glossarhee

Rheeality an existence devoid of facts
Rheeally:  used to express surprise, interest or doubt as in “RUFKM?”  Serheeously!
Rheeap to obtain employment, wealth or stature through the efforts and/or contributions of sugar daddy billionaires
Rheecall: to cancel, take back, or revoke – sort of – a lie one has told
Rheecipient: an individual receiving kudos or monetary prizes based on false data
Rheecommendation:  a suggestion made by a highly unqualified person
Rheedact: to delete factual information from written or oral communication because said information does not support the rheetoric
Rheeduce: to diminish the status of professional public educators
Rheedundant: to rheepeat talking points endlessly in order to avoid questions whose answers would not support a particular rheeality
Rheefer: an herb smoked by corporate education deformers, often used to come up with the ridiculous shit they rheegurgitate incessantly
Rheeform drastic change imposed by clueless people and unsupported by peer-reviewed research or facts
Rheeformer an education deformer committed to imposing drastic change while willfully ignoring input from experts
Rheefudiate: to refuse to be challenged when telling lies, regardless of evidence
Rheefund: bonuses forced to be returned by rheecipients of rheewards based on excessive rheerasures
Rheefurbish: to attempt to repair the status and reputation of one caught in a lie
Rheegret:  sadness felt by a rheeformer when caught in a lie and/or cheating
Rheegurgitate to spew out nonsense; usually done by education deformers
Rheehearse: to practice and repeat key phrases or sound bites for later public performance; e.g. status quo; dramatically change; change the trajectory; put adult interests ahead of students; rheesearch shows; a teacher’s value-added; I don't give a crap.
Rheeinstate: to call back teachers fired based on criteria that violated contract
Rheeinvent:  to spin shamelessly in order to aggrandize one’s self
Rheeism a lie
Rheelay:  to receive and pass on misinformation and/or lies
Rheelinquish: to give up one’s throne due to the anger of the constituency
Rheeluctant: unwilling or disinclined to deal with facts
Rheemail:  an electronic communication generated by an education rheeformer
Rheemember:  to rheecall alleged facts based on hearsay
Rheemove to fire without cause; to fire and replace with cheap, unqualified labor
Rheepeal:  in tandem with complicit union leaders, to make invalid contractual protections, denying educators of important rights
Rheepeat:  stating a lie over and over in an attempt to create a truth
Rheephrase: to express a lie in a different way, especially with the purpose of inciting fear or deflecting truth when confronted with facts
Rheeplace: to change a wrong answer to a right answer; provide or find a substitute for an ousted quack or fraud
Rheeplay:  to play back a section of a rheecording in order to watch and/or hear one’s self again and again and again
Rheeply:  an answer most likely untrue
Rheeprehensible: see Michelle Rhee
Rheerase a strategy employed to raise test scores
Rheerasure the outcome as a rheesult of rheerasing.
Rheesearch a billionaire-funded investigation initiated to support a predetermined outcome
Rheesign to leave a job after 3 years
Rheesist: to vigorously deny facts
Rheespond: to answer a question with a lie
Rheespect: a positive feeling of esteem or deference given to public education deformers, Teach for America, or those determining education policy with no background in education whatsoever
Rheestateto state again the same lie in a new form
Rheesult an outcome obtained through questionable, unethical, illegal, or immoral means; a fake outcome
Rheesumé:  a page full of lies
Rheetaliate:  to seek revenge in an especially evil manner
Rheetard a devotee of Michelle Rhee; a member of the Michelle Rhee Fan Club
Rheetell to change one’s story multiple times; back peddle
Rheetire: to be forcefully driven from one’s position or occupation under a cloak of controversy
Rheetoric: sh!t spewed by Michelle Rhee and other like-minded deformer idiots (See Duncan, Gates, Broad, Kopp, Guggenheim, Oprah, and most of the cast of Waiting for Superman)
Rheetract:  to quickly take back or disavow incorrectly marked test answers or verifiable statements of intentional misinformation
Rheeturn: to elect, or rheeelect, legislators favorable to corporate deformer agendas, usually Republicans or Neo-Liberal Democrats
Rheeverse: acting, operating, or arranged in a manner contrary to proven effective public education policies
Rheeview:  to examine facts then willfully and intentionally dismiss them
Rheevile:  to criticize in an abusive or angrily insulting manner, often involving the word crap or crappy
Rheevise:  to prepare a newly rheerased, edited version of what rheelly was; to intentionally change or modify in order to mislead
Rheevision:  an illegally altered final draft or new version of existing material
Rheevoke: in high-stakes testing, a revoke is a violation of important rules serious enough to render the results invalid. A rheevoke is a violation ranked in seriousness equal to overt cheating, a major offense that is not accidental.
Rheeview: to look over, study, examine facts again then choose to ignore them
Rheevolution: an attack on public education orchestrated by the corporate education deformers.
Rheeward:  a monetary prize based on bogus test scores
Rheewrite:  to write something again in order to embellish or falsify an existing document
Unrheedeemable:  not capable of being cured or reformed due to vicious, destructive actions taken in the name of corporate ed deform
Unrheesonablehaving unsound judgment; unfair and insensible; often in regard to education policy


  1. Oh boy, I love this glossarhee! Very creative, funny, and true. I just found your blog and am looking forward to reading more.

    I taught in the public schools here in Texas for ten years, and it was simply too much. I had no quality of life. My husband left first and I followed two years later. I think we fall into the group of teachers that leave that parents wish would have stayed. We simply couldn't take it anymore.